Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Tell-All Tuesday: I Support Marriage Equality

This one is a no-brainer for me, but sometimes I tend to cowardly try to keep my views on controversial issues away from social media, so I suppose not everyone might know this about me. I have feared losing friends over something like this, but in reality, if someone is going to let a disagreement in beliefs ruin a friendship, then I guess it wasn't one worth having in the first place. I like to think that even if not all of my friends and family have the same beliefs as I do, that they are at least understanding of that fact and can be open-minded enough to hear me out. I 100%, wholeheartedly support marriage equality. Hell, I support equality of all human beings in every sense, but marriage equality just really hits a nerve with me for some reason. The fact that someone is not able to marry the person that they love sickens me. I just imagine someone telling me that I would not be able to marry Kevin, or that I could marry him but would not receive the same treatment as another couple. I love Kevin with all of my heart, and if he had happened to have been a woman, well then so be it, I would love him just the same. I love the person that he is, and getting to celebrate that love with the people that we care about was such an amazing experience. It is a right that every human being should have, so why is this even an argument? I felt silly even writing the word "controversial" in the beginning of this, because it just feels so obvious to me that it shouldn't even be an issue. But it is, and it is a big one. People are not being treated fairly and equally.

I was raised by my parents to always have compassion for others. I was told at a very young age, as far back as I can remember in fact, that being different was okay. That not everyone was going to be the same as me, and that was okay. That was actually a good thing. Not everyone was going to like the same things I do or look the same way that I do. I was taught that this should be celebrated, and that if everyone believed in the same things and looked the same way, what a boring world it would be. I grew up WANTING to be different than everyone else, exploring my creativity through things like art and dance, and making a variety of different friends with all kinds of different interests and beliefs. While it certainly made for some embarrassing photos and funny stories, I was essentially a free-spirit, and for that, I would like to say thank you mom and dad, for letting me be me. Gosh that was cheesy, but I truly am grateful to have had the childhood that I did.

As I grew older I began to realize that unfortunately the world around me was not as understanding and open-minded as my innocent little world at home was. People could be cruel and harsh to others, and all because they didn't like the way another looked, or because someone else thought or acted differently than themselves. Maybe it is simply because of the way that I was brought up, but I can't fathom how anyone can think that they have the right to tell another human being who they can or cannot love. Who is anyone else to think that they are right and someone else is wrong? My brother Logan wrote something one time that my sisters and I came across after he died, and it is something that has always stuck with me.

" Who gets to define someone as normal? Ahh, normal... so many times are things considered normal, but I ask you, what is normal? Personally I believe it's something that will never exist, just like perfect."

This is such a true statement. People have their own individual views of what is considered "normal." Someone may say that a man and a woman getting married is what is normal, and therefore what is right and the way things should be. But what is that really based on? That person's religion? The way that they were raised as a kid? Why is that person the one to decide that it is normal when many other people might believe that a man and a man, or a woman and a woman together is normal? There are so many things that could be argued and that play into this, but my point here is that people are different, and are always going to be different and have conflicting views on many subjects. "Normal" is really just relative, and therefore should not be the basis for whether or not something is right or wrong. What should be a valid argument? That every human being should have the same right to something as basic as love. There is no difference when it comes to love. I would love to just say "love whomever you want, it is none of my or anyone else's business anyway," but unfortunately it is not that easy. I hope that in time marriage equality will happen. It saddens me to know, however, that while laws being passed are a big step in the right direction, the real change that is needed is going to have to happen within the hearts of people, and there will probably always be hate and discrimination anyway. I only hope that Kevin and I are able to raise Ellie with compassion and understanding for others, no matter what.

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